Julie and I met each other freshman year at Texas A&M. Freshman year, second semester, I was severely outclassed in swimming class with a friend of hers from high school, Leslie. Leslie and I looked at each other at the end of the first (impossible) day and I said, “I’ll stay in if you stay in.” and a pact was born. Leslie became a college friend (we haven’t stayed in touch) and introduced me — somewhere — to Julie. Julie and I liked each other instantly — or at least I liked her. It was awkward because we didn’t have a class in common, or live in the same hall, or even work together. So, we saw each other, but not often.

blurry but beloved picture of me and Julie on what must have been her 19th or 20th birthday.

Then, on the day I was coming back to school to start sophomore year, I was moving back in to my first floor dorm room in Keathley Hall. Shanna Moffett, my roommate, was moving in too, and we both had friends in and out. Then, all of a sudden, Julie was there. I was SO glad to see her! I put down whatever I was doing, and we stopped to talk. I remember walking outside, any that it was lovely and not unbearably hot. I remember I wanted to nurture the friendship, and the visit, and encourage her, so we could turn a promising acquaintanceship into friendship.

I have no idea what we talked about, or how I told her how happy I was to see her without being odd. But we did, and I must have, because we were fast friends from then on. Birthday dinners, poetry nights, card decorating, baking, cooking (oh the ten-feet-long homemade pasta), road trips, camping, M&M cookies with one of each color on each cookie (anal much, Elizabeth?). Laughing, talking, sharing books.

I will write much more about beloved Julie Ann (we ended up having our first children just weeks apart, we now have three children each, one boy and two girls, and we lived in DC near each other for about a decade), but I wanted to start with this day because Julie is one of my shyest friends. She always prefers to be out of the spotlight, and rarely seeks someone’s opinion out because she is both private and doesn’t like to be a bother. Her seeking me out that day, going way far outside her comfort zone to drop by unannounced and hope she would be welcomed (oh, she was!) was a great lesson in being bold when the occasion calls for it. And a great start to a lifelong friendship.