Kathleen turns 64 today, and the Beatles song is utterly false: I do still need her, although she fed me more than I ever fed her …

We met through work, when I was in the car repair world. She was 0n the communications committee of the association I worked for, and I was on the communications staff. When I walked in and saw her speaking her mind, holding her own in a room full of men, clad in a basically incredibly awesome argyle sweater, she was instantly imprinted forever on my mind.

She had recently lost her best friend, Jan Clark, called “Clark” by all who loved her, including Kathleen. One time, a year or so after we met, Kathleen and I went for a drive. She told me about Clark, about loving her, about how she found her cancer, about how often they ate dinner together and how they raised Kathleen’s daughter Alyse together (with Alyse’s doting dad). It remains the best drive I ever took in my life.

Kathleen is a woman who loves deeply, and forever. She is a woman who turns 64 today. She is a woman who showed me how loyal, fun, talented and professional a woman can be. She is a leader whom I adore, and who I will forever adore.

I’m trying to call out a specific day. I know that I have hundreds, if not thousands, of days where she taught me how to live, how to be a woman. She negotiated from a place of power. She brooked no disrespect, while giving respect to everyone. She created harmony where there had only been discord. She cracked every single person up — she is genuinely, heartfelt-ly funny.

I guess I remember one Thanksgiving. We always hosted Thanksgiving, and I remember one where I was determined to make this amazing bread. This was in the early 2000s, and you sophisticated people knew all about fleur de sel, but it hadn’t made it to mine and Kathleen’s world yet. I read the recipe, and we searched high and low for fleur de sel. Finally, at Dean and Deluca, the fanciest grocery store Washington, D.C. had to offer, we found it! It was in a hard form, in the fridge, but it said FLEUR DE SEL on it.

We bought it, and prepared the bread. It said on the recipe to ‘sprinkle it’ on each roll, so I pinched a hard part off and pretended to ‘sprinkle.’ We cooked it, and I have to tell you that each roll was utterly terrible. It turns out, with no pretension, we had bought … yes, you are sophisticated enough to know, butter with salt. It was butter, with ‘fluer de sel’ (salt!!! for god’s sake, PLAIN OLD SALT) in it.

When I got hysterical, sure that dinner was ruined for the 20 gathered guests, Kathleen laughed, and laughs to this day. Salt! We paid $15 (this was BACK IN THE DAY, when $15 MEANT SOMETHING), for salted butter.

Anyway. Kathleen taught me more than I could possibly thank her for today, in this blog. She taught me to laugh at myself, and on my best days, I remember. Thank you, Kathleen, for everything. Happy 64th.