So, if school was hard in high school, where did I fit in? For me, in ye olde 1988-1992, the answer was indisputably St. John’s Presbyterian Church. The youth group there, made up of Brandon Wert, Ryan Hartzog, Karen Andrews, Holly Acree and many, many beloved others was sometimes more my home than home was. My mom loved church, too, and so she’d get up early to take me to first service, where I sang (badly) in the choir. Missy was our choir director, and she ruled the place with the kindest, nicest, tenderest iron fist you’ve ever met.

She was single, a rarity for grown women in my circle (well, my mom was single, but due to divorce — Missy had never been married). She made us memorize our music — all of it — for church EVERY WEEK. She made us SMILE when we faced the church. She made us practice twice a week, and made it fun and work. She taught me the value of being prepared, even if it was in an area you weren’t excellent in.

My clearest memory of her is how beautiful she looked, in jeans and a regular t-shirt, conducting our motley crew of sullen teenagers into beautiful, beautiful music. She had this tiny, gently rounded belly, and I thought between that and her hard will and gentle style she was a beacon of what womanhood could be.

And somewhere in our sophomore or junior years, she met Lloyd. Memory fails on where — it was before the internet, so not online like I met my husband — but they fell for each other hard. When we were away at choir camp that summer, we would all walk to the pay phone with Missy and then tease her mercilessly while she talked to LLOYD as we called him, in a singsong voice. I was thrilled she found a guy who knew how awesome she was, and  worried that he would take her from us.

This picture, where I look so happy and loved with my dear Holly Acree and Karen Andrews, was taken at Missy’s wedding, at a ranch far from Houston. There was line dancing, and barbecue, and so many pretty dresses. There was joy and celebration. And thought I thought of Missy as possibly the oldest single person in the UNIVERSE, I think she was probably all of 28 or so when she married. Lloyd did eventually take her from St. Johns, moving to Katy or some other far off suburb where they found a new church, and giving her the babies she wanted. But not before I starred with Holly in a high school church musical that toured as far as ARKANSAS and not before I graduated.

Missy remained one of the most positive influencers in my life. She didn’t make me a better singer (that was just about impossible) but she made me a better person, willing to tackle difficult challenges and smile while doing it. She sings in my heart still.